Polite messages like,
‘’Please, May I”, “Sorry to bother you”, and “Thank you” often gives a positive
reflection of the person saying it. The
effect will remain positive for both parties.
When engaged in a polite conversation, people feel very happy and create
a more cheerful mode.
Holding a polite
conversation is a skill that can be applied and learned by anyone. Most people like to hear all good and
pleasant things, we also know that we always like to be treated the same way,
or better than the way we treat others.
It’s not so much about agreeing to everything, but it is the ‘how’ we
agree or disagree to it. The situation
is more challenging when conversing with the boss, elder people and colleagues
in higher position.
Politeness may be closely
related with using indirect messages in trying to avoid offending the other
person. There are a number of unwritten
and written principles of politeness:
1.
Greetings
o
-‘Good morning, how are you?’
o
-Saying “please” and ‘thank you’
2.
Apologetic language
o
-‘Sorry to bother you, but…’
o
-‘I am sorry but…’
3.
Verbal request
o
-‘I wonder if you could…’
o
-‘Would you mind…’
o
-‘Do you have a minute…’
4.
Listen first and talk in respond to the topic
·
-Avoid interruption while the person is talking
or giving his opinion
5.
Speaking clearly
·
-Use moderate tone
·
-Avoid using slang words
6.
As for clarification politely
7.
Try to avoid talking bad things about a person’s
family members, spouse and children
8.
Avoid any comments and talk about other
religious group if it is not a proper
guided forums or discussion.
9.
Jokes can be sensitive if you do not know the
person’s background
·
-Avoid ethnic jokes if possible
10.
Avoid passing on rumor no matter if it is a
right or wrong one.
It is but easy to hold a
polite conversation if our heart is trying to pretend and be someone else. The easiest way to have a polite conversation
is to always have a positive reflection of other people. Soul cleansing process takes time, but it’s
definitely be work trying. Treat
everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you, but because they are
nice, but because you are.
Uzaimah A. Nizam
Varsiti: Communication English
Berita Harian: 17-23 Mei 2012
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