Short Notes From:
EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES AT WORK
Dealing with Bosses and
Coworkers Who Brain You Dry
Albert J. Bernstein, PhD.
McGraw Hill Education
258 pages
ANTISOCIAL CON ARTISTS
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| credit: clipartheaven.com |
Con
artists crave excitement and the adrenaline rush of living on the edge. They are smooth operators who prefer ‘putting
one over’ to ‘putting people down’. Con
artists usually have no grand designs; they just want what they want when they
want it. Con artists read people as
instruction manuals, paying attention to hidden doubts or desires that can be
used to manipulate.
Con
artists are born hypnotists. They create
enticing illusions that make you eager to do their will. Con artists live for the moment. They want what they want right now, and will
say whatever it takes to get it. They
are not concerned with relationships. To
them, other people are prey, put before them to be exploited. Con artists, may be good at reading people,
but they use their understanding to exploit rather than cooperate.
Con
artists get what they want by eliciting reactions in you. They are good at job interviews! Con artists are natural hypnotists. Hypnosis involves creating an alternative
reality and offering up as an enticement for specific actions. Warning signs of someone trying to hypnotize
you:
·
Deviating
from standard procedure
·
Thinking
in superlatives
·
Instant
rapport
·
Seeing
the person or situation as special
·
Lack
of concern with objective information
·
Confusion
In
dealing with hypnosis, you have to look behind the curtain of illusion to see the
objective facts.
Con
artists cause all kinds of problems both above and below them on the
organizational chart. If you are below,
watch out for manipulation by threats or promises. Watch out for purposely trying to make you
angry at someone else. When con artists
get caught, they start throwing out alternative realities faster than the SyFy
Channel. Their major skill is talking a
good game.
Con
Artists are adept at getting normal people to do things that they know are
wrong. Con Artists entice their victims
to take the first step away from their moral center. Con Artists are experts at seeming to be just
like you. They draw you in by seeming to
see you in just the way you hope to be seen.
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PROTECTING YOURSELF FROM
CON ARTISTS
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SWITCH OFF YOUR AUTOPILOT
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- Stay conscious at
work
- Always ask yourself
why a person tells you something before answering
- Remember, nothing
happens without a purpose in human interactions
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KNOW THYSELF
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- Know yourself first
- Have an accurate
view of your strengths and weaknesses
- Have at least one
trusted friend
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RECOGNIZE A SALES PITCH WHEN YOU HEAR IT
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- Sales-pitch = the
ways that people influence one other
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Basic sales pitches
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Do
it because you like me
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Con
Artist usually begins their approach by establishing a perception of similarity. Their probes and ploys can be seen like
ordinary friendliness. Watch out if
someone starts complementing you.
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Do
it to reciprocate (when someone gives us something we feel obligated to
give back)
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Con
Artists take advantage of this. They
always expect a big return on their investments.
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Do
it because everybody else is doing it
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This
offer is good for a limited time only
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Fast
talking leads to fast thinking, the primeval belief that if you don’t get
it quick, it will disappear,
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Do
it to be consistent
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People
try to maintain an internal sense of consistency between their actions and
beliefs.
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You
can believe me – I’m an authority
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People
are likely to do what authority figures tell them
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Do
it to get one to stop bugging you
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Do
it or else
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To be continued…
Coming next: antisocial
con artist…
