Tuesday, October 11, 2016

8 EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES AT WORK: ANTISOCIAL CULTURES



Short Notes From:
EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES AT WORK
Dealing with Bosses and Coworkers Who Brain You Dry
Albert J. Bernstein, PhD.
McGraw Hill Education
258 pages

ANTISOCIAL CULTURES
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credit: diana-s-blog.blogspot

Organizational cultures is a set of rules, mostly unwritten, that define a group.  These rules are so basic.  Group members think, act and behave in a certain predictable ways.  People who don’t are considered outsiders.  Emotional vampire in upper management create organizational cultures in their own image.

RULES THAT DEFINES ANTISOCIAL CULTURE
1. It’s always us and them
  • There are always good guys and bad guys
  • The enemy is the one who try to stop them from doing what they want
  • Another divide is between the upper management and the rest of the people
2. The money is good even if the job isn’t
  • Money is the lure – people work for them and stay

3. Everything is secret
  • Knowledge is closely guarded by people at the top
  • Questions are not welcome

4. Nothing is in writing
  • Documents can be used as evidence

5. You’ve got to make your own bones
  • You are expected to make it happen

6. Omerta
  • Nobody talks, even if after they leave the organization

7. If the godfather asks for a favor, you don it
  • If you are told to do something, you do it now and don’t ask questions

8. You break the rules



To be continued……
Coming up next: vampire type-histrionics

7 EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES AT WORK: ANTISOCIAL CON ARTISTS



Short Notes From:
EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES AT WORK
Dealing with Bosses and Coworkers Who Brain You Dry
Albert J. Bernstein, PhD.
McGraw Hill Education
258 pages

ANTISOCIAL CON ARTISTS
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credit: clipartheaven.com

Con artists crave excitement and the adrenaline rush of living on the edge.  They are smooth operators who prefer ‘putting one over’ to ‘putting people down’.  Con artists usually have no grand designs; they just want what they want when they want it.  Con artists read people as instruction manuals, paying attention to hidden doubts or desires that can be used to manipulate.

Con artists are born hypnotists.  They create enticing illusions that make you eager to do their will.  Con artists live for the moment.  They want what they want right now, and will say whatever it takes to get it.  They are not concerned with relationships.  To them, other people are prey, put before them to be exploited.  Con artists, may be good at reading people, but they use their understanding to exploit rather than cooperate.

Con artists get what they want by eliciting reactions in you.  They are good at job interviews!  Con artists are natural hypnotists.  Hypnosis involves creating an alternative reality and offering up as an enticement for specific actions.  Warning signs of someone trying to hypnotize you:
·         Deviating from standard procedure
·         Thinking in superlatives
·         Instant rapport
·         Seeing the person or situation as special
·         Lack of concern with objective information
·         Confusion

In dealing with hypnosis, you have to look behind the curtain of illusion to see the objective facts.

Con artists cause all kinds of problems both above and below them on the organizational chart.  If you are below, watch out for manipulation by threats or promises.  Watch out for purposely trying to make you angry at someone else.  When con artists get caught, they start throwing out alternative realities faster than the SyFy Channel.  Their major skill is talking a good game.

Con Artists are adept at getting normal people to do things that they know are wrong.  Con Artists entice their victims to take the first step away from their moral center.  Con Artists are experts at seeming to be just like you.  They draw you in by seeming to see you in just the way you hope to be seen. 

PROTECTING YOURSELF FROM
CON ARTISTS
SWITCH OFF YOUR AUTOPILOT
  • Stay conscious at work
  • Always ask yourself why a person tells you something before answering
  • Remember, nothing happens without a purpose in human interactions

KNOW THYSELF
  • Know yourself first
  • Have an accurate view of your strengths and weaknesses
  • Have at least one trusted friend

RECOGNIZE A SALES PITCH WHEN YOU HEAR IT
  • Sales-pitch = the ways that people influence one other

Basic sales pitches
Do it because you like me
Con Artist usually begins their approach by establishing a perception of similarity.  Their probes and ploys can be seen like ordinary friendliness.  Watch out if someone starts complementing you.

Do it to reciprocate (when someone gives us something we feel obligated to give back)
Con Artists take advantage of this.  They always expect a big return on their investments.

Do it because everybody else is doing it

This offer is good for a limited time only
Fast talking leads to fast thinking, the primeval belief that if you don’t get it quick, it will disappear,

Do it to be consistent
People try to maintain an internal sense of consistency between their actions and beliefs.

You can believe me – I’m an authority
People are likely to do what authority figures tell them

Do it to get one to stop bugging you


Do it or else






To be continued…
Coming next: antisocial con artist…