Thursday, March 13, 2014

Have a polite conversation

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Polite messages like, ‘’Please, May I”, “Sorry to bother you”, and “Thank you” often gives a positive reflection of the person saying it.  The effect will remain positive for both parties.  When engaged in a polite conversation, people feel very happy and create a more cheerful mode.

Holding a polite conversation is a skill that can be applied and learned by anyone.  Most people like to hear all good and pleasant things, we also know that we always like to be treated the same way, or better than the way we treat others.  It’s not so much about agreeing to everything, but it is the ‘how’ we agree or disagree to it.  The situation is more challenging when conversing with the boss, elder people and colleagues in higher position.

Politeness may be closely related with using indirect messages in trying to avoid offending the other person.  There are a number of unwritten and written principles of politeness:
1.                   Greetings
o   -‘Good morning, how are you?’
o   -Saying “please” and ‘thank you’

2.                  Apologetic language
o   -‘Sorry to bother you, but…’
o   -‘I am sorry but…’

3.                  Verbal request
o   -‘I wonder if you could…’
o   -‘Would you mind…’
o   -‘Do you have a minute…’

4.                  Listen first and talk in respond to the topic
·         -Avoid interruption while the person is talking or giving his opinion

5.                  Speaking clearly
·         -Use moderate tone
·         -Avoid using slang words

6.                  As for clarification politely

7.                  Try to avoid talking bad things about a person’s family members, spouse     and children

8.                  Avoid any comments and talk about other religious group if it is not a        proper guided forums or discussion.

9.                  Jokes can be sensitive if you do not know the person’s background
·         -Avoid ethnic jokes if possible
10.              Avoid passing on rumor no matter if it is a right or wrong one.

It is but easy to hold a polite conversation if our heart is trying to pretend and be someone else.  The easiest way to have a polite conversation is to always have a positive reflection of other people.  Soul cleansing process takes time, but it’s definitely be work trying.  Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you, but because they are nice, but because you are.


Uzaimah A. Nizam
Varsiti: Communication English

Berita Harian: 17-23 Mei 2012

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